So, my birthday has now come and gone. (Not if you ask my 4yr old. He thinks that I should have my birthday all week long!) It was a great day, even though it didn't go the way I wanted exactly. When in my life has that happened? I think I like the fact that things happen unexpectedly. It's kinda more fun that way.
My hubby and I went out on a date to celebrate both our birthdays, since his is 5 days after mine. It was nice. Dinner and a movie, but for a couple who doesn't tend to have dates it was wonderful!
In the morning, I was awoken by X and a crying little boy. (I wasn't home when D went to sleep, so he was worried that I wouldn't be there when he woke up.) Then my wonderful husband went with K to get provisions for breakfast since I didn't get the time to go to the grocery store on Saturday.
He came back with eggs, bacon, oreos, o.j., a cherry coffee cake, and some roses (3 white and 2 blue.) I made the bacon, and he made the eggs. I spent some time with the fam, and then decided I needed some me time. X decided to come upstairs and sing "Happy Birthday" to me. Later when I came down, D sang "Happy to you". I am a lucky mommy!!!
Oh, I forgot to mention the washer and dryer that my love bought me. I'm soooo thankful that I only had to go to the laundrymat 2x since we moved here.
I took K back to her mommy by myself due to the fact that the hubby was having serious back problems. It was nice to not to hear the boys cry and whine after sissy left.
I look back on this last year and wouldn't change it for anything. I am truly blessed to have such a loving and healthy family. I am thankful that I am able to stay at home with the boys. I love to watch them learn and play. I love the hugs and cuddles I get all day long.
It will be weird next year when X starts school, but I'm sure it will be alright. (When my hubby and I discussed living here for 2 years before finding a home of our own, I reminded him that X would go to SB schools for his first year, and he couldn't believe that X was old enough. I know that it doesn't seem right, but it is.
X is now grown up...so he says because he graduated to big boy underwear! I just can't believe that my little boys are growing up before my eyes.
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Thursday, September 1, 2011
The questions....
It's been said that we tend to hurt the ones we love. I'm not sure why that is.
Is it due to the fact that we feel save and free to express ourselves around them? Who knows, but it tends to happen even if we don't mean it to. I have found myself in that web many times.
I try so hard to be positive about life and love, but it seems that little miss negativity gets the best of me. There are many times that I am extremely hard on myself and won't let others in. I'm scared of the getting hurt. Who better to cause me pain than me. I am my own worst enemy. Though, I wish I could be my best friend.
I used to always say that Love is a four-letter word. People throw it around like it has no meaning. While others never say it out of fear. Why is it that love is the one thing that we treasure and desire constantly? Love and acceptance?
Sometimes, I wonder why I think, feel, act the way I do. I don't really know much of my family. My parents have never been big on telling me things about their parents or siblings. Just here recently, my mom told me that I remind her of her mother. What good that does me when she past when I was a little thing? Where do I truly belong?
It seems like tonight I am just full of questions and not too many answers. I am therefore I love. I love therefore I cause others pain. I am so unsure of the reason. That is what bothers me.
Is it due to the fact that we feel save and free to express ourselves around them? Who knows, but it tends to happen even if we don't mean it to. I have found myself in that web many times.
I try so hard to be positive about life and love, but it seems that little miss negativity gets the best of me. There are many times that I am extremely hard on myself and won't let others in. I'm scared of the getting hurt. Who better to cause me pain than me. I am my own worst enemy. Though, I wish I could be my best friend.
I used to always say that Love is a four-letter word. People throw it around like it has no meaning. While others never say it out of fear. Why is it that love is the one thing that we treasure and desire constantly? Love and acceptance?
Sometimes, I wonder why I think, feel, act the way I do. I don't really know much of my family. My parents have never been big on telling me things about their parents or siblings. Just here recently, my mom told me that I remind her of her mother. What good that does me when she past when I was a little thing? Where do I truly belong?
It seems like tonight I am just full of questions and not too many answers. I am therefore I love. I love therefore I cause others pain. I am so unsure of the reason. That is what bothers me.
Sunday, August 21, 2011
Not really sure...
This weekend I came to a hard conclusion about myself that really seemed to upset me. I really don't have any friends with whom I can hang out with. My husband and I were talking about how I'd like to go out and relieve some stress, but I countered with the fact that I really don't have anyone to do anything with.
I feel that every time something in my life changed, I had to make a new friend. We moved around a lot when I was a kid, so I focused on moving on. I seem to be an outgoing person. I managed to make tons of friends my one semester of college and when I went down to Texas for my summer of Teen Mania camps. (I only managed to stay in touch with a select few, though.) I don't have a core group that I do things with.
I have focused my time, energy, and life to being a good wife and mother to our kids. The only time that I converse with other adults is on facebook.
What has been a struggle for me, is that fact that I have tried to work really hard on my relationships. Sometimes I feel that I am the one doing all the work. I'm the one who seems to go the extra mile. I even try to help plan family things just so that I'm in the loop and not the last one to know.
I am not truly sure how to remedy this situation. It has been eating at me for a while.
I feel that every time something in my life changed, I had to make a new friend. We moved around a lot when I was a kid, so I focused on moving on. I seem to be an outgoing person. I managed to make tons of friends my one semester of college and when I went down to Texas for my summer of Teen Mania camps. (I only managed to stay in touch with a select few, though.) I don't have a core group that I do things with.
I have focused my time, energy, and life to being a good wife and mother to our kids. The only time that I converse with other adults is on facebook.
What has been a struggle for me, is that fact that I have tried to work really hard on my relationships. Sometimes I feel that I am the one doing all the work. I'm the one who seems to go the extra mile. I even try to help plan family things just so that I'm in the loop and not the last one to know.
I am not truly sure how to remedy this situation. It has been eating at me for a while.
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Projects for my sanity
Being a SAHM gets a little frustrating at times. I feel that I never accomplish anything because all that I do, I have to redo the next day. So, I decided to do some projects.
Doing a not exact replica of the quilt my mom made me has not been an easy task to start. I have wanted to do this for the girl for a long time now. Needless to say, I put that on hold. I have a lot of other projects in my head, though. Quilts for the boys using baby blankets,since they don't use them anymore is one of them.
Just recently I have been invited to a friend's babyshower. She needs just about everything, so I decided to make her a crib quilt using some of my baby blankets before I make quilts for the boys.
Re-using items that we already have into new things has been my thing recently. I am going to make a reading tub for the kids using a long storage tub and some pieces of fabric I have laying around. The only thing I will have to purchase is some stuffing to go in between the fabric.
Crocheting is another craft I have up my sleeves. My mom has wanted to make all the grandkids their own crayon pillow like she made for us as kids. Well, Mom isn't able to accomplish this task, so I have told her that I will try. Oh, did I mention that she doesn't have the pattern anymore?
I have 10 to make, so if I make one a month then they will be done in time for Christmas. It is March and I am 3 behind already! I am in the process of making my first and trying to figure out the pattern from a pattern that is way too big and my pillow from childhood. We will see how that goes!
Doing a not exact replica of the quilt my mom made me has not been an easy task to start. I have wanted to do this for the girl for a long time now. Needless to say, I put that on hold. I have a lot of other projects in my head, though. Quilts for the boys using baby blankets,since they don't use them anymore is one of them.
Just recently I have been invited to a friend's babyshower. She needs just about everything, so I decided to make her a crib quilt using some of my baby blankets before I make quilts for the boys.
Re-using items that we already have into new things has been my thing recently. I am going to make a reading tub for the kids using a long storage tub and some pieces of fabric I have laying around. The only thing I will have to purchase is some stuffing to go in between the fabric.
Crocheting is another craft I have up my sleeves. My mom has wanted to make all the grandkids their own crayon pillow like she made for us as kids. Well, Mom isn't able to accomplish this task, so I have told her that I will try. Oh, did I mention that she doesn't have the pattern anymore?
I have 10 to make, so if I make one a month then they will be done in time for Christmas. It is March and I am 3 behind already! I am in the process of making my first and trying to figure out the pattern from a pattern that is way too big and my pillow from childhood. We will see how that goes!
Monday, January 17, 2011
I am out there
So, I decided that It would be a great idea to get my thoughts and feelings out of my head. This is mainly to help me. Although, I am not opposed to others reading or sharing what I have written.
This may just be the outlet that I need for the time being. I am really trying to get back into writing and it was suggested by a great friend that I do this. So, here goes the neighborhood!
This may just be the outlet that I need for the time being. I am really trying to get back into writing and it was suggested by a great friend that I do this. So, here goes the neighborhood!
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